Courage, Dear Heart

Faith.  Such a loaded word. Such a loaded concept.  After getting sick 13 years ago, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the words, “You just need to have faith. Then God will heal you.”  Countless times I have read the story of the woman who had been bleeding for 7 years. She had tried doctor after doctor, treatment after treatment, to no avail. She spotted Jesus through the crowds and she just knew ,  “If I only touch His garment, I will get well ” (Matthew 9:21, NASB).  Sure enough, as soon as she touched the hem of His garment, her bleeding stopped. She was immediately healed. And then she got to hear the beautiful words I have longed to hear these last 13 years,  “Daughter, take courage; your faith has made you well ” (Matthew 9:22, NASB).  I have begged, I have pleaded, “God, please, I have that faith! I know that You have the power to make me well!” When I remained sick,   I just prayed harder; for more faith, more healing, more hope...

As I continued to read from Ezekiel this week, I came across a passage that hit hard: “ Behold, I myself will search for my sheep and seek them out. I will feed my flock and I will lead them to rest ,” declares the Lord God. “I will seek the lost, bind up the broken, and strengthen the sick ” (Ezekiel 34:11, 15-16a, NASB).  I don’t know about you, but the last several months have certainly left me feeling exhausted, lost, and broken. 2020 has been a year for the books.  Worldwide pandemic.  Racial injustices.  Job losses.  Financial insecurities.  Spikes in mental health disorders.  Anxiety, panic, fear... Where do we go from here?  I’m sure all of you can relate to at least one of these circumstances; I’ve yet to talk to a person who hasn’t felt some of these same burdens. On my part, it’s almost ironic; I was given all of the time in the world to spend with Jesus, but during that first month I felt so lost, alone, and broken that “Jesus-time” be...

This year, one of my goals was to really dive into the Word. I’ve loved reading the Old Testament, and I’m currently re-reading the book of Ezekiel. Ezekiel was a prophet appointed to share the word of God to the Judeans during the Babylonian exile; while most of these prophecies heeded warnings of the trials to come, God would often share prophecies of hope: “‘I will gather you from the peoples and assemble you out of the countries among which you have been scattered, and I will give you the land of Israel.’ And I will give them one heart, and put a new spirit within them. And I will take the heart of stone out of their flesh and give them a heart of flesh, that they may walk in my statutes and keep my ordinances. Then they will be my people, and I shall be their God ”  (Ezekiel 11:17, 19-20, NASB).  Though Ezekiel was prophesying to the Judeans, I have often prayed this same prayer... God, please remove this heart of stone, and give me a heart of flesh.  I deeply strugg...

The last couple of weeks have been really hard on me and my husband. We’ve had some health scares and a lot of personal struggles that have felt so overwhelming. As I’m sure other couples can relate, I truly believe that Satan fears what a Godly relationship can bring to the Kingdom of God. In response to that fear, he wiggles in the best he can, using lies, fears, strongholds, and reminders of our pasts. He does his absolute best to usurp the power and protection that Jesus has over that relationship. The closer Ethan and I grow to each other and God, the harder Satan fights against that threefold cord. As we have struggled to overcome these strongholds in our own lives and marriage, there has been a story from the Old Testament I’ve fixated on: the story of the prophet Elisha and his servant in the book of 2 Kings. In this story, the king of Aram (present-day Syria) was waging war against Israel; during this time, Elisha was prophesying to the king of Israel in order to prepare him f...

In one moment, my life was changed forever.  I was only 19, and I still needed my dad. Seeing him that night was more devastating than I can ever express. My dad was an Iron Man and a seven-time half Iron Man - how could he have a heart attack? And didn’t God know that  I still needed my dad? Didn’t God know that the world needed my dad? Didn’t God know that my church needed my dad? Didn’t God know?  My dad would never meet my husband. He would never walk me down the aisle, and he would never be the one to marry us. He would never see me get my first job, or graduate college against the odds. He would never see me finally get a real diagnosis, after 13 years of being sick without answer. He would never see me decide to go into the ministry field instead of education. He’d never see me discover my truth worth. He’d never make it to his 46th birthday .  Come on, God. Didn’t you know?  God knew.  God knew that my dad would only be here on earth for 45 years. G...

If you know me at all, you know that my all-time favorite author is C.S. Lewis. I’m 26 years old, and my favorite book series is still The Chronicles of Narnia. His brilliance in retelling the Bible through a children’s series has reached around the world - to people of all kinds of faiths. I don’t think there is another author or series that could come close to what Lewis has done for the understanding of Christianity and Jesus’s sacrifice.  I chose to revamp my blog because of all of the darkness we are currently facing. “Aslan and Shadows” echoes so much of what I believe about Jesus. In “The Silver Chair,” Lewis writes,  “They turned and saw the Lion himself, so bright and real and strong that everything else at once began to look pale and shadowy compared to him.”    Similarly, in the book of Revelation, John writes,   “The City does not need the sun or the moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and the Lamb is its lamp” (Revelation ...

If you have kept up with the news, you know about Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor (and her boyfriend), and George Floyd. You know about the peaceful protests and the riots. Or, maybe you’re staying away from the news and social media; maybe it’s too hard to hear, or too sensitive an issue. For the longest time, I did the same thing. I knew about the issue, and yet I covered it all with a blanket. And in my actions – in my silence – I hurt so many. I cannot be silent . We cannot remain silent. If we don’t fight this injustice and violence now, what happened to Ahmaud, Breonna, and George (along with hundreds of thousands of others throughout history) will continue to escalate. We must do better. Unfortunately, I have noticed that social justice gets a bad reputation amongst Christians; but if you read the Word, it becomes obvious that Jesus was a true representative and advocate for social justice. Listen to the story of the Good Samaritan: In this p...