Courage, Dear Heart

If you know me, then you know that I’ve spent a lot of my life really sick. Unfortunately, I’ve also spent a lot of my life apologizing for being sick. Lately I’ve been looking back on all of these years I’ve spent saying sorry: sorry that I have to cancel plans, sorry that I’m not up to talking on the phone, sorry I can’t take a road trip, sorry I can’t help someone move or cook or clean, sorry I have to miss parties or get togethers…and now I can’t help but think – Why? Since I was thirteen, I’ve been diagnosed with and suffered from dozens of different things: autoimmune diseases, certain forms of arthritis, fibromyalgia, small fiber neuropathy, muscle and joint spasms, severe insomnia, an extra heartbeat, anemia, ulcers, intestinal and stomach damage, hair loss, unexplained rapid weight gain, celiac disease, allergies, night terrors, severe adrenal fatigue – the list is endless. I’m exhausted all of the time and in pain all of the time. So why do I need to apologize? An...

I titled this blog “Through the Fire” because I believe so many of us are walking through flames. I have people whom I love so dearly who are going through heartbreak and pain, family members suffering, and my own issues. If you’ve read my blog before, then you know I will never put my pain above anyone else. There are hurts and aches in this world I could never begin to imagine; my only goal is to bring hope and God’s affirmation to the suffering. God helps me do this through sharing my story. I hope this particular blog can bring some of the Lord’s hope into your heart . These last four months have been really hard on my husband and I. After months of health issues and several ER visits, I finally got diagnosed with Celiac’s disease. I had to eat gluten for the nearly two-months before the procedure to confirm the biopsy; if you know anything about Celiac’s, then you know how badly this messes you up. I now have intestinal damage, damage to the lining of my stomach, ulcers, al...