Courage, Dear Heart

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve probably heard about the Texas abortion ban. This post is likely to grind some gears, but as someone who loves Jesus, it’s something I can’t stay silent about. Because the truth is that most pro-lifers aren’t pro life from womb to tomb. I used to be one of them. It’s not a matter of what “Pro Life” does mean - it’s a matter of what it should mean.  To be “Pro Life” is to be anti death penalty. Currently, the death penalty is retained in 27 states . To be “Pro Life” is to welcome the immigrant, and to create an easier path towards legal citizenship. It can take over a year and a half to become a legal U.S. citizen - and that is without any delays. To be “Pro Life” is to allow same-sex couples and single people to adopt and foster. There are several states that allow discrimination against same-sex adoption under “religious” rights , and while single people are legally able to adopt/foster, they face many challenges in doing so ....

I wake up out of my restless sleep.  I look around, see the dogs, take a deep breath. Everything feels okay in this moment. And then…it starts. Heart is racing, hands sweat, and tunnel vision begins.   Get the dogs out of bed, move the pillows, straighten the sheet, make the bed. Straighten all of the drawers, get the chair ready, fold all the blankets in the house. Brush my teeth, 6 sections, 20 seconds a section, then mouthwash for one minute. Take the dogs out, get Marshall his medicine, get my coffee. I’m ready for Jesus Time -  Wait. You didn’t floss.  Heart is racing, go and floss. For a brief moment, my heart calms down. So I go and sit in my chair, and put in my headphones.  Wait. The corner of the bed isn’t straight.  Wait. Marshall needs combed again.  Wait - did you lock the door?  Wait - did you leave the oven on? You haven’t been in the kitchen, but you need to check. I sit down and begin to journal, but I can’t finish before the intr...